What did I get myself into now…


I have a lot of new reader’s…emails asking who I am…what I am, and a few other pieces of spam.
For the real enquiree’s that really wanted to know..this is the post that started it all:

Honoring the Sacred Sport of NASCAR
It is my feeling that as a citizen concerned with the religious rights of All, that being forced to work on Sunday because of driving, “give it to me right now”, consumerism is wrong. Obviously some government officials out there in our fine country agreed with me and gave employees the right to apply for religious accommodations from employers, so they could not be forced to work on the Sabbath of their choice. I, being an avid Nascar fan have come up with a solution to the “Sunday dillema” for all Race fans. It is called :

The “Church of the Great Oval” .
To join this church you must agree to and follow the creeds and doctrine of said church.
LAW 1.
YOU agree to observe the following days as Minor and Major Sabbaths
a. ALL Sundays during Race Season. If there is no Race on Sunday you will use this day to celebrate that you have nothing that you HAVE to do. These HOLY days are considered MAJOR SABBATHS.
b. All Saturdays during Race Season. Although not all Saturdays have Races, there are always qualifying events and you might need to prepare for the Sunday Sabbath Race the next day. Saturdays are also considered MAJOR SABBATHS.c. MINOR SABBATHS are considered to be any Thursday, Friday, Monday or Tuesday that you must travel to and from a Race to attend Church. This includes travel and recovery time.
LAW 2.
REGARDING TITHING:
a. All Race expenses, souvenier costs and related items shall be considered tithing.

b.If you have additional money that you would like to donate, Clance’ will gladly take it off your hands. She will look high and low for someplace to spend it. It will be hard but she CAN manage to do it.
LAW 3.
REGARDING WORSHIP
:

a. Your Driver will be considered your personal Avatar. You must display the number of your Driver’s car somewhere proudly on your vehicle.b. If you do not have a vehicle or don’t even like NASCAR, the Members of The Church of the Great Oval will pretend you do.
LAW 4.
REGARDING Church Status:
a.The more memorobilia you display, the more pious in the Church you will become.
The Church of the Great Oval is currently accepting suggestions…
*************************
A few days later…
“I think I am on to sumpthin” I say.
“Boogity…BOOgity…BOOGITY!!” D.W. says…
all sorts of thoughts are going through my mind as it turns and churns over this gigantic life decision
1. I can get ordained on line for FREE on the internet. ** ( I did)
2. I could marry people at races. **(I can)
3. I could perform baptisms. **( I can)
4. I could perform funerals. ** ( I can)
5. I could get a tv ministry and make a BUTTLOAD of money. **(still thinking about that one)
6. This might even be LEGAL. **( It is.)
7. I am fairly sure that I am going to offend someone with all this.
*( I have)

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9 Comments

  1. (second time because it didn’t take the first time i made a comment)

    7. I am fairly sure that I am going to offend someone with all this.

    Join the club sweetheart, I do the above on a regular basis. I think it’s my goal in life (eg)

  2. People ask what you are? Huh?
    SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, sing it with me…..
    I still need Kenseth decals for my car. But I just want his number, not big tacky shit. And the pricing for shipping at NASCAR.com for stickers was a joke!
    Someday…..I need to check eBay.
    Or maybe I should wait a year. His contract is up this year……

  3. Antonette, I believe that of myself also…**lol**

  4. I can tell you what you are! You are a wonderful friend, and a fantastic person. Ok!!!

  5. You need to do another announcement for the driver contest: Current standings to be voted off: (I’m voting for Biffle, because Matt’s to close to the top and would appreciate some help)

    Kurt Busch (87) 32%
    Martin Truex Jr (70) 26%
    Matt Kenseth (24) 9%
    Greg Biffle (18) 7%
    Robby Gordon (12) 4%
    Tony Stewart (9) 3%
    Ryan Newman (8) 3%
    Joe Nemechek (6) 2%
    Bobby Hamilton Jr (5) 2%
    Dirver Survivor Contest- click here

    Remember- it’s DAILY now!!!

  6. Also, on the sexiest driver contest, round 2 is over. Tony is up against Kasey Kahne and needs help, I will assist. Matt is up against Brian Vickers, if y’all can please help on that one, I’d appreciate it. This one lasts a week and you can vote everyday. Also, think it would be funny if Robby Gordon beat Jeff Gordon!!!! 🙂
    Sexiest Driver contest-click here

  7. I believe that as long as you’re an equal opportunity offender, then it is totally ok!! 🙂

  8. ok, here is how far out of the loop i am when it comes to nascar and racing in general..when i saw that your site was called the church of the great oval….i thought it was a site on the worshipping of vagina’s…a goddess blogsite about worshipping the great pussy..sooo, its not huh? race car …in a big oval…oh …i get it…doh…

  9. I will try to answer this in on little post….Looks like Antonette and I both may need Rocky to be our attorney someday…Jackie Sue …you need to come see me when I am at the Texas Race… I am glad Taz and Babs still like me and I will go vote for Dale Jarrett now…**lol**


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